blog #151 >> I did really well.

Scott brought this into work today from this month's Reader's Digest.
I thought it was really funny, and I did really well.
These are two things I like.
T

blog #150 >> Driving the Behemoth

I like little things: Buttons, pebbles, baby booties, mice, things that are small. Therefore it would make sense that I would enjoy driving something small, and I do. I by no means love my current car, but it does get me to where I want to go... most of the time. However, this week my little fuel efficient car is in the shop, the blower on the AC/heater/defroster bit the dust. And until it returns, I'm borrowing THE TRUCK. My parents graciously let me borrow their extra car, (a full-sized truck) until I get my car back. And now I'm a nervous wreak. And I hope I don't wreak it! It's like learning to drive all over again... downtown... in a steamship.

I can't wait to get my car back. Parking the truck is not fun. It's too big to park in the lower parking lot at my apartment because the spots are too small. Just a couple days ago, I had to move my little car because I couldn't open my doors to get out after I squeezed it into one of the spots. And I can't pull out of the upper parking lot with it because the lot is right on an intersection. So parking for me must be on the street. I can't parallel park on my best day and it's even more complicated when you're at least two feet longer and wider than everyone else. Pulling out with it is even worse. There will be no shopping trips for me this week. I don't think I could even get through the driveway at New Seasons with it. Luckily, I can park in the empty church lot a couple blocks up from where I work. So parking there isn't a problem. To add to its difficulties, it's too tall for me to get in and out of while wearing a skirt.

I can't wait to get my car back. Driving the truck is not fun. All the streets are so narrow in Portland, and I can't even make a corner without driving into the other lane or going over the curb. Today I did both several times. I had such a hard time at the round about on Clinton and 36th. I couldn't see until I was in the street and then someone was coming and then while I was waiting for them, someone else came the other way and couldn't get around me. So then I had to go, but couldn't make it around the center island and had to drive over it. It was very embarrassing. I'm just not used to how it handles yet. It's like steering a ship.

I can't wait to get my car back. Stopping the truck is not fun. The truck does not stop like a car. You must break a long time before you actually need to stop. And every time I break, it will lurch forward before the breaks catch and actually start slowing it down. Yellow lights are frightening. There is no stopping or speeding up really. You just have to keep on going. Fortunately, I'm never going very fast. Giant monster trucks are not known for speed or the ability to take off quickly. Today a poor little squirrel ran out in front of me. "Run little squirrel! Run!" I just couldn't break fast enough. He did make it to the other side alive, but just barely.

I can't wait to get my car back. Other people do not think trucks on the road are fun. People are not kind to you when you're driving a truck in the city. They are angry just looking at you. They will not show any mercy or compassion for any reason. They do not like that you are big and taking up over half the road. They do not like that you are slow. They do not like that trucks use more gas and let off more emissions. And other people enjoy showing that dislike in rather aggressive and hateful ways. If you are in a truck, you are the enemy of drivers everywhere. Other drivers will not let you in, will tail gate you, will shout obscenities at you, and will flip you off. Last time I borrowed the truck someone actually left their box of leftovers under the rear tire so I would smash it when I pulled out. Luckily, I caught it and threw it out before I backed up. But really people! Must you be so cruel?!?

I can't wait to get my car back. But I need to remember the benefits to driving a truck this week. a) I can haul stuff if I need to. It would be a good time to take a trip to IKEA, if I hadn't just gone. b) I can tow stuff. I have no idea what I would ever need to tow, but I could if I had to. c) I have four-wheel drive and can go off-roading. Those little unpaved streets that connect neighborhoods in Portland, won't be a problem now. d) I can see above other cars really well. And it doesn't have much of a blind spot. e) It's got an all year State of Oregon Park Pass in the window. If I weren't working this week, I could get out and enjoy nature for free. f) I don't have to take the bus. g) If some rude driver is flipping me off, well then, "Hey, I'm a lot bigger than you!" And I can drive them over and smash their car!

I guess driving the truck won't be so bad after all. I'll just try to stay as much out of everyone's way as possible.

T

blog #149 >> The Phailure of the Opera

First of all, just let me say, "I really love The Phantom of the Opera." I love the music, the sets, the costumes, the plot. It's a great play. If you've never seen it, you should go rent the movie. (RIGHT NOW!) The movie is fabulous. And the more I see it, the more I like it. The actress who plays Christine has a phenomenal voice. Singing seems as natural to her as breathing. Although the actor who plays the Phantom can't sing as well, at least he seems dangerous and doesn't sound like a wimp. I saw the play in a theater for the first time when I was thirteen and it really made an impression on me.



(Scene from movie, which is excellent.)

Anyhow a couple weeks ago my mom bought a CD with a collection of songs from Andrew Lloyd Webber musicals done by the London Philharmonic. Well, it was really good and got passed around between my sisters and I. And this of course this brought back memories of when we last saw it, and how great the play was. Soon we all wanted to go see it again.

It turned out it was currently playing in Portland at The Keller Auditorium and it had only a few days left before moving to Seattle. My grandma offered to buy us all tickets, and before you knew it, we were off in high hopes to see the show.

Little did I know, it was to be the worst show I've ever seen in a theater. (And that includes high school musicals.) It didn't start well, and ended worse. Almost all the characters had understudies playing their parts. Charlotte was played by an understudy. Christine was played by the understudy of the understudy. And The Phantom was played by the understudy, of the understudy, of the understudy. I'm just not sure I can describe in words how bad this show was. We paid money for this? When it started bad I thought, "Well, we haven't seen any of the main characters sing yet. Let's just wait until Christine comes on and then we'll see some good singing." Charlotte came on and sang her part. (Off-key and poorly as she's suppose to.) And when Christine sings the same song. (To show she can replace Charlotte and sing it waaay better.) She was even worse! Ah! How can this be? She was off-key, couldn't sing the high notes, and warbled worst than Charlotte. It's like they were making an Alto sing a Soprano part. I just wanted to help her through it. The poor thing! I felt so bad for her. I just wanted to say, "Here let me give you the note to start out on." And it seemed like everyone was mumbling every word. (Probably because they forgot half of the lyrics.) You couldn't understand anything they were saying. It's a good thing I knew what was going on or I would have been lost.

And if Christine was bad, The Phantom was worse. The acting throughout was horrible. And The Phantom was the worst of all. "The Music of the Night" he sang in a whiny voice and sang half of it while crawling of the floor. "Um... Why are you rolling on the floor? Are you trying to swim?" People were actually laughing during the murder scene. (When The Phantom hangs a guy during a performance.) "Um... That was suppose to be the scary part." But I have to admit it was pretty funny. It was like murderous shadow puppets on a sheet. "And next The Phantom will be creating a bunny rabbit for your enjoyment." Oh, it was bad. Raoul has never looked like such a good choice. Only I'm not sure Christine deserved him. She should have stayed with The Pathetic Loser Phantom and they could have squealed sweet songs together in the night.

I have to admit though, the orchestra was good, the costumes were great and the stages were nice. But it's really the singing and acting that matters. You can get by without costumes, music or stages at all if the acting and singing is good. It was like a huge moldy cake covered in pretty icing. It looks nice, but that's not what really matters. Raoul was an okay singer, and so was Charlotte. What they should have done, was replace Christine with Charlotte. You could tell, Charlotte was only trying to sound bad, but could really sing well if she wanted to. But overall... Ah, it was bad.

They even cut parts out. Like Christine receiving red roses tied with black ribbon from The Phantom. And the sword fight in the graveyard. I want to see them fight! And isn't the chandelier suppose to fall at the very end, after the opera of Don Juan? I don't think it's suppose to fall before intermission. And flames! I want to see flames during Don Juan and "The Point of No Return." I'll admit, it had been a long time since I saw it in the theater. But I'm sure that version had roses and a sword fight. What happened? Did we have our expectations too high? Did it seem more impressive last time because I was so young? Is it because we went to the matinee instead of the evening performance? Is it because everyone acting was an understudy? No one else in the audience seemed to notice the horrible singing or acting. They all stood up cheering and applauding with a standing ovation at the end. Were they just being polite? Was it a plant? Did they pay a couple of people to stand up in the front to make everyone else stand up? My family and I can't be the only ones who thought it was bad.

I just don't get it.

T

p.s. Okay, now I'm feeling guilty about about all the mean things I said about The Phantom of the Opera. I really do like the play and the movie. It's just that, that particular performance wasn't very good. But it was still really fun to go and spend the day with my sisters, mom and grandma. And afterwards we had a lovely dinner together. So I feel like I shouldn't be complaining...
t

Corrections: In the movie the chandelier falls at the end, but in the play it falls before intermission. In the movie there is a sword fight, in the play the Phantom is suppose to throw fireballs from his magical staff.

p.p.s. Stop telling me all the funny things you thought of and post them instead so other people can read them too.
t

blog #148 >> I Heart Coffee

I heart having an espresso machine at work. Normally, I'm a tea person. But some days I need coffee.
T

blog #147 >> Paint Chip Dilemma

Help! My bedroom is blah.
And since I'm not painting the walls in my apartment, I'm thinking I'll paint the furniture. Why have white walls and white furniture? But what color should I paint them? I've narrowed it down to these five colors. I kinda like the "Marsh Green." But I think after two months, I'd be sick of the green. And I do like the "Hawaiian Sky" with the pink 50's things. I just don't know. I'm terrible at picking paint colors. I think I'm over thinking this. I should just go with my first choice of "Pursuit Of Happiness" and run with it. Does anyone else have any input? Here's some photos I played with in Photoshop to show what they'd kinda look like painted.
1. State Of The Union
2. Pursuit Of Happiness
3. Hawaiian Sky
4. Far Away
5. Marsh Green
(Aren't paint chip color names crazy!)
T

blog #146 >> Hats off to you

Here's the new hat I also bought yesterday while out and about with my mom. It fits a However, I think my hair may be too short to use one. Does anyone know how to use a hat pin?
T

blog #145 >> Book of the Week: Cookbooks

Yesterday I spent the day with my mom and we went shopping around town. At Troutdale Antique Mall we found these great cookbooks. The Cooky Book and the Better Homes and Gardens New Cook Book are almost just like the ones my mom uses. And both the New Cook Book and Sewing Book were just $3 each.


The perfect basic cookbook.





If I lived in Cookie Land, this would be my house.